She Strengthens

The Unspoken Burden of Divorce: How Growing Up with Divorced Parents Shapes Your Financial Future

As a child, I was acutely aware of the cost of everyday items, constantly reminding my mother to prioritize our budget. This financial awareness was a result of my parents’ divorce, which exposed me to the harsh realities of adult life at a young age. When you’re a child of divorce, you often become your parent’s confidant, shouldering the weight of their financial concerns.

A Different Childhood

Growing up with a single parent means you’re more likely to be involved in financial decisions, even if you’re just a kid. My mother, who worked hard to support us, would often discuss our financial situation with me, making me keenly aware of the importance of saving and budgeting. Even now, I have a tendency to resist unnecessary expenses, a habit formed from those early conversations.

Joint Custody and Financial Uncertainty

When my father moved to our area, I entered a joint custody arrangement, splitting my time and expenses between two parents. Many people assume that children of divorce have similar financial experiences to those from intact families, but that’s not always the case. Divorce brings its own set of financial complexities, often leading to ongoing disputes between parents about money.

The Blame Game

When parents divorce, it’s not just about dividing assets; it’s about who enabled whom to earn what. This can lead to feelings of resentment and anger, with each parent believing the other should contribute more to support the children. As a child, you’re caught in the middle, unsure of who to turn to for financial help.

Seeking Financial Independence

To avoid the constant disputes and uncertainties, I sought financial independence as soon as possible. During college, I took on multiple jobs to cover my expenses, rather than relying on my parents. Having my own money meant I didn’t have to navigate the complex web of who should pay for what.

Breaking Free from Financial Dependence

Growing up with divorced parents can make you more determined to achieve financial independence. By taking control of my finances, I avoided the potential conflicts and guilt trips that come with asking parents for money. Today, I’m grateful for the lessons I learned, even if they were shaped by the challenges of my childhood.

A New Perspective

My parents, despite their divorce, remain my greatest supporters. I’m fortunate to have had their help throughout my life, but I’m also proud of the financial independence I’ve achieved. My experiences have taught me that taking control of your finances is not just about money; it’s about breaking free from the emotional burdens that come with growing up with divorced parents.