She Strengthens

Breaking Free from Financial Burden: Learning to Set Boundaries

As someone who has always been inclined to help others, I’ve often found myself sacrificing my own financial well-being for the sake of others. Whether it’s footing the bill for friends or donating to causes I’m not invested in, I’ve come to realize that my generosity has cost me dearly.

The Cost of Being a “Giver”

Over the years, I’ve spent thousands of dollars on people who didn’t necessarily deserve it. I wasn’t able to say “no” to myself or set appropriate boundaries on who I should be giving to (and when). This lack of financial backbone has led to significant financial regret.

Toxic Friendships and Financial Fallout

One particular friendship comes to mind where I consistently paid for our monthly dinners, even when my friend could have covered the cost herself. I eventually grew tired of shouldering the burden and spoke up, suggesting we hang out at my place instead. However, she declined, and I realized that our friendship was more about convenience than mutual respect. By setting boundaries and prioritizing my own financial goals, I saved approximately $480 a year and rid myself of a financially toxic friendship.

Mindless Giving and Charity

I’ve also been guilty of donating to various fundraisers and events without fully considering the impact on my own finances. On average, I’d donate $20 to acquaintances’ causes at least three times a year, adding up to $60 annually. This year, I decided to be more thoughtful about my donations, focusing on causes I’m truly invested in, like my local animal shelter charity walk. By redirecting my donations, I’ve saved $60 a year.

Regretful Spending Habits

Looking back, I regret the money I spent buying drinks for others during my 20s when I was still struggling to find my financial footing. By taking only cash when going out, I’ve avoided overspending and saved around $780 a year. Additionally, I once paid for almost an entire tattoo for a friend, costing me $250 plus a tip. If I had set boundaries and encouraged her to cover her own expenses, I wouldn’t have incurred this unnecessary cost.

The Power of Saying “No”

In total, setting boundaries and developing my financial backbone has saved me around $1,370 a year. By learning to say “no” to unnecessary expenses and evaluating my purchases more consciously, I’ve not only increased my savings but also weeded out toxic friendships and become more mindful of where my money is going.

A New Era of Financial Awareness

Breaking free from the burden of being a “giver” has been a liberating experience. I’ve come to realize that setting boundaries and prioritizing my own financial goals is essential to achieving financial stability and security. By being more intentional with my spending and donations, I’m building a stronger financial future for myself.