She Strengthens

The Surprising Truth About Engagement Rings: What I Learned Designing My Own

As someone who’s been engaged for a little over four months, I’ve had the opportunity to design a beautiful ring with my partner, Marc. While I cherish the ring and the process of creating it, I’ve come to realize that the traditional engagement ring process is often rooted in outdated gender norms.

Taking Control of the Design Process

I loved the experience of designing my ring with Marc and a talented jeweler. It was a collaborative effort that allowed us to create something that truly represented our combined taste and financial decisions. I believe that every woman should have a say in the design and cost of their engagement ring, rather than simply being presented with a surprise.

The Dark Side of Engagement Ring Shopping

During the design process, I was shocked to learn about the many damaging gender norms that still exist in the engagement ring industry. For instance, women are often prevented from seeing the price of the ring, even if they’re contributing financially to its purchase. This lack of transparency can lead to women being excluded from the conversation altogether.

Five Shocking Facts About Engagement Rings

1. Women are often kept in the dark about prices: In many cases, men will explicitly instruct jewelers not to show the price of the ring to their partner. This means that women may have no idea how much their ring costs, even if they’re contributing to its purchase.

2. The process can be deeply transactional: The engagement ring industry is often driven by a “bigger is better” mentality, where the size and cost of the diamond are seen as a measure of love. This can lead to couples making impulsive decisions and overspending on a ring.

3. The diamond dominates the cost: I was surprised to learn that the central stone, often a diamond, makes up the vast majority of the ring’s cost. This means that the surrounding stones and design elements have relatively little impact on the overall price.

4. Budgets are frequently blown: When women aren’t involved in the financial conversation, they may unknowingly choose a ring that exceeds their partner’s budget. This can lead to overspending and even debt.

5. Women are often unhappy with their rings: Sadly, many women are secretly unhappy with their engagement rings because they weren’t involved in the decision-making process. This can lead to a ring that doesn’t reflect their personal style or tastes.

The Importance of Collaboration

In conclusion, designing my own engagement ring was a liberating experience that allowed me to take control of the process and create something truly meaningful. I believe that every woman should have the opportunity to be an active participant in the design and purchase of their engagement ring. By doing so, we can break free from outdated gender norms and create a more equal and empowering experience for all.