She Strengthens

Breaking Free: My Journey of Self-Discovery and Financial Independence

The Unexpected Beginning

When I left my ex-husband, my life was turned upside down. With no clear direction, I had to navigate the complexities of starting anew. The first step was getting my own bank account, which I did two days before I left him. It was a terrifying move, but a necessary one. I took out $1,000 cash from our joint account, knowing I needed something to start over. Little did I know, this was just the beginning of a long and arduous journey.

Unraveling the Past

As I began to disentangle my life from my ex-husband’s, I faced numerous challenges. I had to fight to get my own phone service, and I was lucky to have gotten the car loan in my own name. With $1,000 in my pocket and a car to my name, I started the process of rebuilding my life. It wasn’t easy, and I soon found myself unemployed, living in a $25-a-night Airbnb, and struggling to make ends meet.

The Dark Days

The months that followed were some of the darkest of my life. I was surrounded by uncertainty, and my credit score was in shambles. I had to come to terms with the fact that I had over $50,000 in debt, a number that sent me into a rage. I was angry at myself, at my ex-husband, and at the situation I found myself in.

Finding My Way

It took me almost a year to confront my financial situation, but when I did, I was determined to take control. I started by paying off my consumer debt, one step at a time. I’ve since paid off $4,500 and have learned to manage my finances using YNAB. It’s been a long road, but I’m finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Lessons Learned

Looking back, I realize that I should have taken advantage of alimony when I had the chance. It would have made a significant difference in my life, especially during those early months of separation. I’ve also learned the importance of being honest and transparent about my finances. It’s okay to ask for help, and it’s okay to admit when you don’t know what you’re doing.

A New Chapter

As I approach 18 months since I left my ex-husband, I’m proud of the progress I’ve made. I’ve had eight jobs, ranging from $9/hour to $18/hour, and I’ve learned to appreciate the value of hard work. I’ve also learned to prioritize my own needs and desires, rather than trying to please someone else. I’m not the same person I was five years ago, and that’s a good thing.

A Message of Hope

If you’re reading this and you’re going through a similar situation, know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to start over, and it’s okay to ask for help. Don’t be afraid to be honest about your finances, and don’t be too proud to accept assistance when you need it. You will get through this, and you will come out stronger on the other side.