She Strengthens

Breaking Free from the Cycle of Poverty

The Price of Survival

Growing up in poverty, I learned that degradation and abuse are often the cost of staying alive. The constant struggle to make ends meet creates a tunnel vision that makes you believe that suffering is justifiable – that there’s no other option. But I’ve come to realize that poverty is a form of violence, forcing us to endure hellish situations just to afford the basics.

The Trap of Toxic Situations

I used to think that quitting a job was never an option. I had to put myself through college without a family, and I was willing to tolerate any form of abuse to stay afloat. But after years of working multiple jobs at once, I finally broke free from the cycle of poverty. I applied for nearly 300 jobs, traveled to New York for interviews, and eventually landed a full-time offer. It wasn’t perfect, but it was a step up from juggling multiple jobs.

The Illusion of Stability

However, I soon realized that even a stable job can be unsustainable. I was doing hard work I didn’t like, and my mental health was suffering. I justified staying in the job, telling myself that I needed the money and that others had it worse. But deep down, I was terrified of leaving and ending up back in poverty.

The Power of Self-Reflection

It wasn’t until I went back to therapy that I realized my tunnel vision had tricked me. I had two options: save my money and spend my emotional energy on a job that hurt me, or spend my money and save my energy for something I cared about. My therapist asked me a simple question: “Is this situation adding value to my life, or taking value away?” The answer was clear: I had to leave.

Taking Control

Quitting that job was one of the most freeing experiences of my life. It marked a turning point where I took control of my life, despite uncertain consequences. I got a seasonal retail job to help me pay the bills, and then I continued my job hunt. I devoted half a year to figuring out what I wanted, how much money I needed, and who I am.

The Privilege of Choice

I realize now that my ability to quit two jobs in succession comes from a mix of privilege and hard work. Many people living in poverty can’t just quit – they have families to support, and less privilege than I do as a white woman living alone in New York. But having that choice is a privilege that many simply don’t have.

A New Relationship with Money

Since quitting, I’ve gone back to freelance writing and communications work. It’s not perfect, but it gives me the ability to focus on myself. I’ve learned to value myself and prioritize my mental health. I no longer force myself to put everything toward the bare necessities. My emergency savings account is no longer more important than my sanity or overall health.

Investing in Myself

I’ve come to realize that it’s okay to break my budget sometimes as long as I’m being smart about what I’m investing in. If I’ve learned anything from poverty, it’s that your life doesn’t really belong to you. But if I’ve learned anything from quitting those jobs, it’s that if you have the choice to invest in yourself, you owe it to yourself to try.