She Strengthens

Money Lessons from Childhood

Growing up, our experiences with money vary greatly. Some of us have no concept of it, while others are acutely aware of its importance. I fell somewhere in between. As a child of divorce, my parents’ financial discrepancies played a significant role in shaping my understanding of money.

A Tale of Two Parents

My father, an immigrant from India, came from a wealthy background. He was part of the business caste and had a set path laid out for him. However, he chose to leave India and start anew in America, where he worked hard to maintain his status. My mother, on the other hand, grew up in Los Angeles in the 1950s and 1960s. She started working at 14 and eventually moved to New York City to pursue a social work degree. Both of my parents reached financial stability later in life, but as a kid, I was aware of the struggles they faced.

Money and Marriage

Money was a major factor in my parents’ divorce, and it caused tension in our household. As a child, I didn’t fully comprehend the concept of money, but I knew it could break up a marriage, even in relatively affluent homes. I often felt poor compared to my friends who lived in modern developments with clean carpeted floors and pantries full of snacks. In reality, we lived in a large old house with an acre of property, and I never went hungry. However, I felt deprived, perhaps due to the guilt of being privy to my parents’ financial fights.

Working from a Young Age

I chose to work from a young age because I wanted things my parents couldn’t provide. However, I lacked financial literacy and didn’t understand concepts like savings, investments, credit, and debt. My parents taught me the importance of hard work, but no one sat me down to discuss long-term financial planning.

The Consequences of Lack of Financial Literacy

Growing up in a low-income household, I learned to spend what I earned because that’s all I had. I didn’t understand the value of saving for the future. When I graduated from college with no debt, I didn’t know how to build credit. I eventually built up my credit, but I spent beyond my means, resulting in a good credit score but mounting bills.

Shifting Blame to Taking Responsibility

At first, I was angry with my parents for not teaching me how to manage money. But I realized that they did the best they could with what they had. They worked hard and came from humble beginnings. It’s easy to blame our parents, but ultimately, we bear some responsibility in our financial situation and literacy.

Overcoming Financial Programming

After reading Kate Northrup’s Money: A Love Story, I realized that understanding my family dynamics was crucial in overcoming my financial patterns. By writing my own money love story, I’m taking ownership of my decisions and working towards financial freedom. As a parent, it’s essential to instill financial literacy in our children to ensure their future success. However, I still have a long way to go and a lot of debt to pay off. By taking responsibility for my decisions, I can make better ones in the future.