She Strengthens

The Elusive Definition of Success

As I reflect on my early twenties, I realize I had a distorted view of what it means to be successful. I thought it was about owning a certain image, one that exuded confidence, style, and luxury. I envisioned a life where every detail was meticulously curated, from the clothes I wore to the kitchen gadgets I used. I believed that a successful person’s lifestyle was a reflection of their skills, confidence, and refined taste.

Chasing the Illusion

I tried to emulate the successful women I admired, from Eva Chen to Jenna Lyons. I followed their every move on social media, taking note of their fashion choices, beauty routines, and lavish lifestyles. I thought that if I could just replicate their habits, I too could achieve their level of success. So, I splurged on designer clothes, luxurious beauty products, and high-end gadgets. But the more I tried to fit into this mold, the more I felt like an imposter.

The Myth of Material Possessions

I soon realized that my pursuit of success was misguided. I had been chasing an illusion, thinking that material possessions could bring me validation and confidence. But the truth is, true success comes from within. It’s about financial stability, self-awareness, and a sense of purpose.

Lessons Learned

Looking back, I can identify the mistakes I made. I thought I needed:

• Expensive blazers: To look professional and successful, I thought I needed a pricey blazer. But a nice blazer from GAP can achieve the same look at a fraction of the cost.
• Louboutins: I believed that owning a pair of Louboutins would make me feel elegant and sophisticated. But in reality, they’re just shoes – and uncomfortable ones at that.
• Fitbits: I thought a Fitbit would motivate me to take care of my health. But it’s just a gadget, and true motivation comes from within.
• West Elm furniture: I wanted to own stylish and functional furniture, but I didn’t need to break the bank to achieve it.
• Cashmere sweaters: I thought cashmere was a symbol of luxury, but it’s just a soft, overpriced fabric.
• Meal subscription services: I believed that meal kits would save me time and make me feel like a high-achiever. But they’re just a convenient, overpriced option.
• Diptyque candles: I wanted to own a luxurious candle, but it’s just a label – and a pricey one at that.
• Fine cheese: I thought I needed to know about exotic cheeses to be sophisticated. But nice cheese is just nice cheese, regardless of the price tag.
• Expensive wine: I believed that serving expensive wine would impress my guests. But honestly, nobody cares about the brand as long as it’s not cooking wine.
• The latest phone: I thought I needed the latest iPhone to be successful. But a phone is just a tool, and true success comes from within.
• La Mer face cream: I coveted a jar of La Mer, but it’s just a pricey skincare product – and not even that effective.

Redefining Success

Today, I know that true success is about living a life that’s authentic, financially stable, and fulfilling. It’s about valuing what I already own and being grateful for what I have. My version of success includes having a high-yield savings account, financial stability, and a sense of purpose. I’ve learned to separate material goods from my self-worth, and it’s been the best thing I could have done for myself.