She Strengthens

Breaking Free from Financial Anxiety

As I reflect on my twenties, I’m reminded of the overwhelming sense of anxiety that dominated my life. It was a period marked by family struggles, personal fears, and a lack of direction. My finances were a mess, and I often felt like I was drowning in debt.

The Weight of Avoidance

One particular incident stands out – when I tried to cancel my cable subscription, only to be told months later that I owed hundreds of dollars. I disputed the charges, but the debt collector continued to pursue me. Instead of facing the issue head-on, I chose to ignore the problem, hoping it would magically disappear. This pattern of avoidance became a recurring theme in my financial life.

The Anxiety Cycle

Anxiety has a way of making everything feel impossible. When faced with a problem, my instinct was to panic, shut down, and escape into social media or TV. I’d hit “Ignore” on calls from unknown numbers, fearing they were debt collectors. It was a vicious cycle, and I didn’t know how to break free.

Finding Solace in Therapy

In 2020, I finally found a therapist who helped me uncover the roots of my anxiety. Through weekly sessions, I began to confront my emotions, and slowly, I started to feel lighter. I began to tackle tasks that previously felt overwhelming, like tracking my spending habits and opening my bank account without feeling anxious.

The Power of Self-Awareness

As I continued to work through my anxiety, I realized that it was closely tied to my finances. I started to take small steps towards financial control, like following financial blogs and reading books on the subject. These small actions gave me the confidence to take on bigger tasks, like opening a high-yield savings account and creating a budget.

A Breakthrough Moment

In a recent therapy session, I had a breakthrough that left me sobbing tears of relief. I realized that I had the power to dictate my life, my space, and my emotional journey. This epiphany gave me the courage to sit down and categorize every single expense from the previous month. I saw where I was spending my money, and more importantly, why.

Taking Control of My Finances

By examining my spending without the weight of anxiety, I was able to identify areas where I could improve. I saw that some expenses brought me joy, while others were simply avoidant. I began to make conscious decisions about my spending, and slowly, I started to feel more in control.

A New Chapter

Today, I’m learning more about myself and my relationship with money. I’m no longer held back by anxiety, and I’m free to dream of a debt-free life, owning a home, and traveling without stress. It’s been a long and slow process, but I’m finally taking control of my finances and my life.