The Social Media Engagement Epidemic: Why Seeing Others’ Proposals Can Be Painful
As the seasons change, my social media feeds transform into a never-ending parade of engagement announcements, “I said yes!” selfies, and targeted jewelry ads. It’s enough to make me feel like a cymbal-clapping toy monkey, stuck in a cycle of forced congratulations and secret despair.
The Pressure to Put a Ring On It
We’re conditioned from a young age to believe that life follows a specific timeline, with coupledom, engagement, and marriage arriving in our mid-20s. But the reality is that people are getting married later, with the median age of marriage rising to 29.8 for men and 27.8 for women in 2018. Relationship coach Stella Harris emphasizes that marriage is a significant life decision that shouldn’t be made out of obligation or pressure.
Coping with Friends’ Engagements
So, how can you deal when your friends are saying “I do”? Here are a few strategies to help you navigate the situation:
Acknowledge the Shift in Friendship
It’s okay to acknowledge that your friendship with your newly engaged friend might change. You can still be happy for them while recognizing that your dynamic will shift.
Bond with Single Friends
Spending time with other single friends can help normalize your feelings and provide a sense of community. Just be careful not to wallow in your solo status for too long.
Give Yourself Credit
Dating can feel like a full-time job, but you already have one! Give yourself credit for prioritizing your career and other aspects of your life. Take stock of your accomplishments and focus on the positive.
Don’t Be an Ass
It’s natural to feel left out or jealous, but don’t let bitterness get the best of you. Remember that your friends’ engagements are their own stories, not a reflection of your worth.
Practice Self-Care
Use your friends’ commitments as motivation to commit to yourself. Focus on self-care, gratitude, and personal growth.
Get Off the Sidelines
If your jealousy stems from a lack of romantic prospects, get out there and start dating! Use online services, ask friends to set you up, or try new social activities.
Stay Hopeful
Believe that the right person exists for you, and stay open to new experiences and connections. Remember, the right time to get married is when you meet the right person.
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