This Black History Month, we’re faced with a stark reality: systemic injustice and social unrest continue to disproportionately affect Black communities. The pandemic has exacerbated these issues, leaving many feeling helpless and unheard. As we navigate this tumultuous landscape, a crucial question emerges: How can Black Americans find peace in a country that has historically caused them so much pain?
To answer this, I turned to my grandfather, Doss Calvin Bender, a man who has lived a life worthy of legend. From his childhood during the Great Migration to his 27-year tenure as a firefighter and NAACP leader, his story is a testament to resilience and determination.
Through our conversation, I distilled three vital lessons that have brought him peace throughout his remarkable life.
Embracing Self-Worth
My grandfather’s journey began with his mother, Celia Mae Bender, a woman who refused to be defined by the racist attitudes of her time. Despite facing incredible hardships, she instilled in her children a sense of self-worth that has been passed down through generations. My grandfather believes that this unwavering confidence is essential for Black people to cultivate, as it allows us to make tough choices and ultimately find peace.
Community Care
After serving in the Marines, my grandfather became a firefighter in Milwaukee, where he noticed a disturbing trend: the fire department’s entrance exam was rigged to exclude Black candidates. He took action, suing the department and winning a consent decree that led to the hiring of over 1,000 Black firefighters. This experience taught him the value of community care and the impact one person can have on creating positive change. By focusing on helping others, we can find a sense of purpose and satisfaction that brings us peace.
Integrity Above All
When I asked my grandfather for advice on finding peace, he emphasized the importance of integrity. In a world where honesty and authenticity are often in short supply, he believes that being true to oneself is crucial. By staying grounded in our values and principles, we can navigate even the most challenging situations with confidence and find inner peace.
As I reflect on my grandfather’s wisdom, I’m reminded that peace is not a destination, but a journey. It requires patience, self-awareness, and a commitment to living with integrity. By embracing these lessons, we can begin to build a more just and equitable society, where Black Americans can finally find the peace they deserve.
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