She Strengthens

The Art of Assertive Conversation

A few months ago, I found myself in a disconcerting situation that made me reevaluate how I present myself in social gatherings. While enjoying a night out with friends at a local bar, a new acquaintance, let’s call him Trevor, joined our conversation. Trevor’s behavior was jarring, to say the least. He dominated the conversation, speaking loudly and over others, without regard for their opinions or feelings.

The Anatomy of a Trevor

Trevor is a peculiar individual. He’s young, blond, and often wears suspenders. He smokes a pipe, seemingly for no reason, and considers himself a movie buff. However, his knowledge of films is superficial, and he tends to focus on male actors, ignoring the female leads. When confronted with his behavior, Trevor becomes defensive and talks louder, effectively silencing others.

The Frustration of Being Talked Over

I’ve experienced similar situations before, where I’ve been interrupted, railroaded, or talked over in social settings. Usually, I’d make a lighthearted comment and wait for my turn to speak again. However, Trevor’s behavior left me feeling frustrated, defenseless, and wondering why I seemed like an easy target.

The Quest for Inner Strength

I don’t want to become loud or aggressive to assert myself. Instead, I aspire to be like those individuals who command respect without needing to shout or demand attention. People like Oprah or Glenn Close, who exude confidence and authority without being overbearing. I want to learn how to project my inner strength outwardly, making it clear that I won’t be easily dismissed.

A Social Experiment

Conversations are not as simple as they seem. They require active listening, empathy, and respect. To counter the loud and entitled individuals like Trevor, we need to develop strategies to assert ourselves without being aggressive. A simple “I’m sorry, may I finish what I was saying?” can be an effective way to reclaim our space in the conversation.

Calling Out Bad Behavior

Trevors of the world often go unchallenged, and their behavior is reinforced by the lack of pushback. By calling them out, we can create a ripple effect, making them aware that their actions are not acceptable. This takes strength and courage, but it’s essential to establish boundaries and maintain respect in our interactions.

Taking Back Control

In retrospect, I wish I had handled the situation with Trevor differently. Instead of engaging in a futile argument, I should have calmly stated my discomfort with his behavior. Seeing those words in print now, it seems so straightforward, so empowering. Let’s make a conscious effort to assert ourselves, to be the strong, respectful individuals we aspire to be. It’s time to take back control of our conversations and show the Trevors of the world that we won’t be silenced.