She Strengthens

Navigating Financial Struggles with Loved Ones

The Struggle is Real

Being financially dependent on others can be a daunting experience, especially when you’re used to being self-sufficient. I’ve been there, done that, and currently, I’m facing a similar situation. After ending a side-job that brought in some much-needed income, I’m now on the hunt for a new one. While my loved ones have offered to help, I’m finding it tough to accept their assistance.

The Importance of Self-Sufficiency

As someone who’s always preferred to be employed and somewhat self-sustained, I’m struggling to come to terms with relying on others. Even at 15, I was working part-time jobs and babysitting to earn my own money. Now, at 22, I’m finding it hard to accept that I need help from others.

Balancing Support and Enablement

I’ve spoken to several people who’ve had to navigate similar situations with their loved ones. The common thread is finding a balance between supporting them and enabling financially dangerous behavior.

Real-Life Examples

Alison shared her experience with her best friend who’s struggling with money management. She’s taken a nuanced approach, offering to pay for things but also encouraging her friend to take responsibility by paying her back.

Molly’s boyfriend quit his job to find a more fulfilling career path. She’s supporting him financially and emotionally, but they have open lines of communication about his job search and the expectation that he’ll eventually contribute equally.

Joey, on the other hand, has lost friendships due to people taking advantage of her generosity. She believes that giving people what they need without expecting effort from them can create a sense of entitlement.

Taylor’s girlfriend is unemployed and struggling to make ends meet. He’s supporting her by helping with job searches, motivating her, and providing emotional support.

Finding a Balance

The key takeaway is that finding a balance between supporting loved ones and enabling them is crucial. It’s essential to have open and honest communication about expectations, responsibilities, and boundaries. By doing so, we can ensure that we’re helping our loved ones without creating a sense of dependency.