She Strengthens

Navigating the Complexities of Wedding Culture

As I’ve recently crossed the threshold into my late 20s, I’ve found myself attending an increasing number of weddings. While it’s exciting to celebrate the union of loved ones, it’s also sparked some introspection about the role of women in wedding culture.

The Expectations of Marriage

My experiences with weddings have been diverse, ranging from intimate city hall ceremonies to grand, elegant affairs. Through these experiences, I’ve had the opportunity to reflect on what I want for myself and what aspects of wedding culture are meaningful to me. As a woman, I’ve come to realize that the expectations surrounding marriage are vastly different for me than they are for men.

The Wedding Industrial Complex

The vast majority of the wedding industry is geared towards women, preying on our desires to create the perfect day. We’re expected to fret over every detail, spare no expense, and present ourselves as the epitome of elegance. This pressure can be overwhelming, and it’s often accompanied by the assumption that we’ll take on a new identity as “Bride” and eventually, “Wife.”

The Loss of Individuality

From the moment a woman gets engaged, she’s often gifted with items bearing her new name, congratulated on her new title, and showered with attention. While this may seem celebratory, it’s also a subtle reminder that she’s leaving behind her individual identity. We rarely see men receiving the same treatment, and it’s worth asking why.

The Significance of Names

One aspect of wedding culture that’s particularly striking is the tradition of women changing their names upon marriage. While it’s often done out of excitement to join a new family, it’s also a significant departure from one’s former self. I’ve noticed that women often change their names on social media immediately after the ceremony, which can be bittersweet to witness.

Defining Happiness

As I navigate my own feelings about marriage and identity, I’m reminded that everyone deserves to define their happiness on their own terms. However, it’s essential to acknowledge the historical context and societal pressures that shape our decisions. I’ve been having open and honest conversations with my partner and friends about these issues, and I believe it’s crucial to approach these decisions thoughtfully.

A Bittersweet Transition

When I do eventually decide to take my partner’s name, it will be a complex and emotional experience. Leaving behind a part of my identity will be difficult, but it’s also a testament to the growth and evolution of Chelsea Hunt. As I look to the future, I hope that our daughters will inherit a world where these questions seem quaint and outdated, and where weddings and marriage are truly equal and celebratory for all involved.