She Strengthens

Rethinking the Dream: Breaking Free from the Pressure to Keep Up

As I grew up, I learned that trying to “keep up with the Joneses” was a negative phenomenon, synonymous with consumerism. It’s the urge to acquire the things our neighbors have, just to fit in. But what happens when this pressure to conform extends beyond our neighborhoods and into our online lives?

The Rise of Social Media Envy

With the proliferation of social media platforms like Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram, we’re constantly bombarded with curated images of perfect homes, perfect lives, and perfect possessions. It’s easy to get caught up in the illusion that everyone else is living a more exciting, more luxurious life than we are. But the truth is, many of these seemingly perfect spaces are manufactured for the sake of social media, with items bought new just to be featured in a post.

Reframing Consumerism as Self-Deserved Treats

We’ve been conditioned to believe that certain material possessions are rewards for our hard work and dedication. And while it’s true that we deserve to treat ourselves, we need to be honest about our motivations. Are we buying that luxury item because it truly brings us joy, or because we feel pressured to keep up with our peers?

Four Areas Where We’re Breaking Free

My husband and I have made a conscious decision to reject the pressure to keep up with the Joneses in four key areas:

1. The Yard: A Space for Us, Not for Show

We’ve opted for a low-maintenance patio area, vegetable and flower gardens, and a minimized lawn. It may not be the traditional suburban dream, but it’s what works for us. And with nearby parks, we don’t need a sprawling backyard to enjoy the outdoors.

2. Furniture: Function Over Form

Our home is a eclectic mix of hand-me-downs, thrift store finds, and IKEA pieces. It may not be the most stylish or cohesive space, but it’s functional and comfortable. And we’d rather allocate our budget to more pressing needs, like our mortgage.

3. Clothing: Practicality Over Fashion

We’ve adopted a thrifty approach to fashion, opting for second-hand stores and outlet malls. It’s not about making a statement or keeping up with the latest trends; it’s about being presentable for work and staying warm.

4. Cars: Paying Cash Over Payments

We’ve chosen to save up and pay cash for our vehicles, rather than committing to monthly payments. It may mean driving older cars for a while, but the financial freedom is worth it.

Looking Inward, Not Outward

In the end, it’s not about judging others for their choices or feeling superior about our own. It’s about recognizing the external pressures that drive our consumerism and taking the time to reflect on what truly brings us joy and fulfillment. By doing so, we can make more intentional decisions about how we spend our time and money, and create a life that’s authentic and meaningful to us.