The Frugal Lessons My Mother Taught Me
Growing up, my mother was the epitome of frugality. It wasn’t by choice, but out of necessity. After becoming a single mother to two young girls, she had to pinch pennies to make ends meet. I remember arguing with her about our financial situation, thinking we were better off than we actually were. But she knew the struggles she faced, and the sacrifices she made to provide for us.
Learning to Save
Despite our disagreements, I mostly followed her financial advice. I saved half of my birthday and Christmas money, got part-time jobs from a young age, and opted for a state school instead of a private university. Looking back, I’m grateful for those decisions, especially avoiding the burden of student loans.
A Costly Mistake
However, when I was 19, I made a mistake that went against my mother’s most important financial rule: keep your savings private. I started dating a boy and, caught up in the romance, I shared my financial situation with him. Big mistake. We were semi-long-distance, and I would often take off from my waitressing job to accommodate his schedule. I prioritized his needs over my own, and our financial contributions became lopsided. He would frequently reference my savings, saying, “You have so much money!” and I’d end up footing the bill more often than not. That summer, I burned through $1,000 in my checking account.
A Hard-Learned Lesson
That experience taught me a valuable lesson: prioritize your own financial health and don’t let others dictate how you spend your money. I realized that I shouldn’t feel guilty about having more money than someone else, especially if it means bankrolling unnecessary expenses. Since then, I’ve been mindful of how much I share about my finances with loved ones and make sure to keep money talk separate from my relationships.
Taking Control of My Finances
When I’m ready to share my financial situation with a partner again, I’ll do so more discerningly and think carefully about what a fair share of financial responsibility looks like. I’ve learned to be in control of where my money goes and not let guilt or pressure dictate my financial decisions. My mother was right, and I’m grateful for the lessons she taught me.
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