A Moment of Silence
As I sat in my small apartment, surrounded by hundreds of virtual faces on Zoom, the host requested a moment of silence. It was for George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, and all the unarmed Black individuals who had lost their lives at the hands of police. I instinctively turned off my camera, sank into my sofa, and let the tears flow.
The Weight of Reality
Breonna Taylor’s story haunted me. We shared the same birthdate, lived in the same state, and were both Black women building a future for ourselves. The thought of her life being cut short by police bullets left me breathless. My petite apartment suddenly felt suffocating, and I couldn’t shake off the fear that I could be next.
Panic and Paralysis
As I struggled to come to terms with the reality of their deaths, I found it hard to focus on work. The pandemic had already limited our escape routes, and these difficult conversations were taking a toll on my mental health. I felt like I was losing a battle with my own emotions.
The Importance of Self-Care
It was then that I realized the importance of prioritizing my mental health. I needed to take a step back, acknowledge my distress, and focus on radical self-care. I took a day off, closed the curtains, lit lavender candles, and gave myself permission to process each death.
Reclaiming My Time
In the spirit of Maxine Waters, I was reclaiming my time. I rid myself of work responsibilities and focused on me. I wrapped my hair in a purple silk scarf, applied vanilla lotion, and spoke words of affirmation to remind myself why I love my brown skin.
A Call to Action
As I navigated this journey of self-care, I realized that it’s crucial to prioritize our mental health, especially during these trying times. Not everyone may be able to “Call in Black” like I did, but it’s essential to be intentional with how we spend our time. Take a walk, phone a friend, sing your favorite song, or simply cry – do something for you and only you.
A Historical Moment
We are living through a historical moment, where the global community is coming together to address white privilege, police brutality, and institutional racism. It’s a challenging time, but it’s also an opportunity for growth and change. As Angela Davis once said, “Anyone who is interested in making change in the world has to learn how to take care of herself, himself, themself.”
My Love for Being Black
Despite the pain and discomfort, I love being Black, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. By taking care of myself, I’m able to continue fighting for justice and equality. I hope that my story will inspire others to prioritize their mental health and take a moment to focus on themselves.
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