Love Across the Miles: The Unforeseen Costs of a Long-Distance Relationship
As a teenager, I romanticized about dating a handsome, mysterious man abroad, preferably one who rode a Vespa. However, as I grew older and discovered my love languages, I realized that a long-distance relationship wasn’t ideal for me. That was until I met my partner, and we got engaged. Then, the pandemic hit, and he had to move back to Scotland due to visa complications. Suddenly, I found myself in a long-distance relationship, willing to temporarily adjust my perspective and budget to stay connected with my partner.
Reworking My Budget
The most obvious expense in a long-distance relationship is flights to visit your partner. I had to redirect a portion of my savings from future travel to visiting my partner. This temporary shift in my budget has been manageable, knowing it’s for a short-term need. Additionally, I’ve started including thank-you gifts in my travel budget, like bringing my partner’s parents their favorite American treats.
The Surprising Costs of Staying Connected
One of the unexpected expenses of a long-distance relationship is the increase in sending small gifts to my partner. Since we can’t show affection through physical dates or cooking for each other, we rely on non-digital ways to express our love. This means sending surprise gifts, like snacks or ingredients to recreate our favorite happy hour spots. I’ve even Venmo’d my partner to grab a coffee or treat themselves. These small gestures have become essential in reminding each other that we’re thinking of each other.
A Breakdown of My Expenses
Here’s an overview of what I’ve spent in the past year to accommodate my long-distance relationship:
- 2 Roundtrip Flights: $1,533.90
- Thank You Gifts for 2 Trips: $208.67
- Unexpected Covid Test Required by the UK: $168 (120 UK Pounds)
- Two Travel Insurance Policies: $106
- 1 Year’s Worth of Small Thinking Of You Gifts: $305.32
- Holiday-Related Gifts and Postage: $250.78
- Cards and Postage: $43.45
- Flight Credit (I have one canceled flight from January 2021 due to the new UK strain): $608.12
- Grand Total: $3224.24
Navigating the Pandemic
The pandemic has added a layer of complexity to our long-distance relationship, both financially and emotionally. I constantly ask myself: How often can I see my partner without posing a risk to myself or others? With each trip, I quarantine for six weeks, juggling health risks, airline industry uncertainty, and rapidly changing government regulations. Purchasing flights has become a calculated risk, considering cancellation policies and potential refunds.
Despite the challenges, my partner and I remain committed to making our long-distance relationship work through small gestures and digital connections. We’re proof that love can conquer distance, even in the face of a pandemic.
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